Wednesday, April 13, 2011

One of my best friends Gwyn is having a boyyyy visit her tomorrow.

And she is very nervous because this is a boy who she went to high school with but to whom she'd never talked to in real life before but started IMing and texting and calling this last semester while she started college and now they are in the throws of 18-year-old-lusove (lust and love) and he's visiting her and for the very first time, they will hang out in person.

She is incredibly anxious, and not because he might turn out to be a CRAZY 17-YEAR-OLD MURDERER who woos college girls and visits them and KILLS THEM (as I would be worried about) or that he'll get there and they'll have nothing to say to each other and it will be the most awkward four days ever (another thing I'd worry about). She is the MOST worried that he'll get there and think she is ugly because, even though they skype for 2-3 hours a night, he's only ever seen her through the computer and she is convinced he will think she is ugly and run away from her as soon as he gets off the plane.

(Side note--when she told me that she was skyping with her new boy-toy for 2-3 hours PER NIGHT I got kind of competitive, as I am known to be, and so I decided I would talk to MY boyfriend for 2-3 hours because we've been together for almost 2 years and if she can do it, then we could DEFINITELY do it and probably do it better and be more funny and more awesome. After about 45 minutes, we decided we needed to start playing online scrabble because we had nothing left to say to each other and then we bickered about whether or not "boi" was an ok Scrabble word. It isn't.)

So, I've been telling her that she is being irrational because he's going to love her, especially because they talk constantly. However, I DO know what she means about the whole illusion of skype thing. I spend a LOT of time on skype and I am 100% convinced I look ten times prettier there. For example, here is what I look like on skype with Greg:


So I was making Greg take screen shots of me when we were skyping to illustrate how I look really cute on a computer screen because it's a little square and even though my hair looks ratty in person it looks pretty and like goldilocks' hair on a good day, and my eyes look like they are the bluest blue ever, like avatar blue, and also they look like they take up half of my face like a cartoon character, and my face which has like 7 zits on it at all times minimum looks spotless and shimmery and clear and my teeth look like someone should hire me to be a tooth model even though in real life, they are kind of yellow and have coffee stains, but THEN he sent me the screen shots and as I was shuffling through, I couldn't help but NOTICE THIS:



It's not just there when I smile normally.

It's there when I look excited:

It's even there when I make a "YOU WIN!" face!!!:

So then I tried to not allow the eyebrow to do its thing and also smile. It's REALLY HARD. And I actually was trying. Not trying to look funny. I swear. And I looked like this:

and then Greg was eating ice cream and not paying attention to me he was like, "What are you talking about. There's no eyebrow issue." And I said YES THERE IS and I showed him by first smiling while also holding down my eyebrow and I look kind of normal:

and then I made THE SAME SMILE but without holding it down and look what happened:

I'll be honest. This is not the first time that I have looked at pictures and thought "Hey, that one eyebrow goes up a LOT more than the other and I look a little bit like a little child molester."

but until TODAY, I believed my friends who were are always telling me, "No way, you're crazy!" and Greg who just repeats, "You are pretty, there's no eyebrow issue."

WELL I am showing them this blog entry because now there is UNDENIABLE PROOF OF MY ROGUE EYEBROW.

So basically, this entire blog post changed. And the moral of the story is that I do NOT look prettier on skype, I just look like I have a crazy eyebrow that has a mind of its own and/or am an INSANE ovelry excited creepster who wants to grind with you at a club.

Gwyn does not have a rogue eyebrow. In fact she has perfect eyebrows that she never plucks. Look:

HER eyebrows stay the same. One of them does not have overly ambitious desires to jump across her face.
EVEN WHEN SHE'S MAKING THIS FACE, her eyebrows are more in line than mine: 

So basically, Gwyn will be just fine. Now excuse me as I go practice my smile and attempt to control the brow. :)


  1. Hahah YOU ARE THE CUTEST! One of mine goes up a bit more than the other, too! :) Good luck to your friend!

  2. I have an eyebrow that does that constantly!! I'm willing to bet it's even up in the air when I sleep, too. But it's ok, because I think people who have an eyebrow that does that are more interesting to look at than people who's eyebrows behave themselves.:D

  3. LOL Liia, I don't even know what you're talking about. I am trying to find something wrong with it, and I can't! You're a weirdo! :P

  4. I think rogue eyebrows add character! ;) Just found your blog from 20sb, funny first post to read!

  5. Oooh yay! Thanks so much! But seriously. rogue eyebrows. The worst. :)